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Post by Master Warious on Jul 4, 2004 13:20:58 GMT -5
Meanwhile
Haldir was being chased by Agent Vader who was desperate to get his Pepsi back.
~~~
"So," Agent Smith spoke, "what has this person done that you have to 'bring her to justice'?"
"Good question." Darth Warious said. "What did she do any way?"
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Post by Trinity on Jul 4, 2004 14:25:57 GMT -5
*** Trinity
"Hmm something about buying stocks behind someone's back, or something... I really don't know, she just scares me because she likes to clean so much," Trinity responded. Martha looked up at her from where she was sitting and mumbled something inunderstandable because of the gag tied across her mouth to keep her from spouting off cleaning tips. " Ah, Agent Smith, how good of you to join us," she said as she looked warily at her archnemisis.
*** Agent Vader
" Give me back my Pepsi, you pointy eared person!!" Agent Vader yelled from the swoop bike he had boarded to pursue Haldir, who had stolen his precious Pepsi. The elf didn't listen, and this angered Agent Vader even more...
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Post by Tiana, eh? on Jul 4, 2004 19:25:54 GMT -5
Eowyn Skywalker grinned. "HIIIIIII AGENT ELROND... person... yeah... HI! How NICE of you to join us whist we torment those who torment us. Say, you wouldn't happen to know the wereabouts of a certain Mary-Sue... brown hair, looks like Padmé, stole MY Anakin, and turned him to the nonexistant Dark Side.... sigh."
She looked around. "Hey, exactly what's happening anyhow... why exactly was I tying up some nice old lady..."
Martha shot daggers from her eyes, leading Eowyn to blindfold her as well. "SHE'S EVIL!!!!!!!! DOOM!!!" Eowyn proceeded to scream. "MWHA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA- HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA- HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA -HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA- HA-HA- HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA... gasp... ack... can't breathe... must... keep... breathing... ack..."
[If you use arsenic mixed with vineger on your kitchen sink...] Martha began, using the Force to comunicate. Everyone then decided that it was a good time to borrow Han's blaster, and stun her. "And were you thinking that we were dressed strangely, Smith?" asked Eowyn, as another thought came to mind.
***
Anakin
"Hey, did that elf just steal Agent Vader's Pepsi?" Anakin asked, several minues behind on the story line. Everyone proceeded to jump on him. "ANNNNAAAAAKKKKIIINNNNN!!!!!"
"What?" the "chosen brat" Anakin asked.
They then proceeded to slap him a few times. "KEEP UP WITH THE PLOT LINE!!!!!!"
"What plot line?" asked the dazed Anakin.
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Post by Master Warious on Jul 5, 2004 19:40:20 GMT -5
Haldir
Haldir zoomed around the Empire State Building and then weaved over and around several others to shake off the very angery Agent Vader who was chasing him. Then a thougt occured to him. Haldir flew over to the ocean colse to the water then dumped the Pepsi into a ocecan liner's gas tank. Haldir flew back to the mainland and depositied the empty Pepsi can into a open dumpster. Then quickly zoomed off to avoid Vader's wrath.
~~~~ Warious
"Well," the Agent replied, "you are dressed differently from other New Yorkers." "Hey Trinity!" Warious asked after an idea came to mind. "Can we hunt down J.K.Rowling while we're at it? I heard she was here for a few days. We could kill her, while we're looking for Kate. Please? Pretty please? You know that she must die for her vileness." Warious pursuaded.
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Post by Trinity on Jul 5, 2004 21:27:03 GMT -5
*** Trinity
Trinity thought long and deep about this proposition. " Don't hurt yourself," Agent Smith said sarcastically. Trinity glared at him before replying. " Okay, we can hunt down J.K. Rowling, too. I will never forgive her for creating a creature as vile as That weird kid with the glasses... what's his name? Peeves: Potty Wee Rotter.," Trinity decided. " Quick, TO THE PINK BUS OF TERROR!!" she exclaimed as she began to head up the steps. At a thought, she stopped half way up and looked at Smith. " Is he coming with us?" she asked, ab it waril at that.
*** Agent Vader
Agent Vader looked down into the ocean liner gas tank where Haldir had dumped his Pepsi. " That cursed elf..." he muttered among other things. After getting over the loss of a perfectly good half can of Pepsi, Agent Vader flew off to buy a new case to quench his Pepsi thirst. He may be addicted to Pepsi, but not enough to go into the gas tank of an ocean liner to get it...
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Post by Vanacoriel on Jul 6, 2004 3:17:52 GMT -5
Faster than a speeding, land speeder, a short and plaid vested hobbit flew up the street to the point where Trinity stared at the agent. " HP*gasp* must*dramatic pause* dye!!!" the slightly breathless hobbit exclaimed. Whipping out a lighsaber she bent over. " I offer you my service, in payment to this quest to eliminate Rowling and Bosworth! And...whoa! is that Marth Stewart?" Everyone raised an eyebrow, except Smith who's eyebrows are permenantly stuck vertical. Like two fuzzy trees. Straightening, she grinned flashing two slightly pointed teeth. [[Vampire Hobbits to the max]] " Name is Vanacoriel Took and I am after Rowling for ruining everything and Bosworth because a) she doesnt desevre Orlando and b) blue crush annoyed me. So, what about breakfasts?"
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Post by Trinity on Jul 6, 2004 11:59:23 GMT -5
*** Trinity
" Those reasons sound good enough to me! hop on," Trinity said, glad that the vampire hobbit was on her side. She turned to Smith. " Okay, I guess yu can come, but I warn you. I will not hesitate to put you back off on the streets. Here are my conditions: stay behind the yellow line at all times, and no guns or other firearms are allowed in your possesion on the bus. Deal?" she said, sticking out her hand. " Deal," Smith said, shaking the said hand. He handed over his gun and Trinity locked it in the gun locker, which would stay permantently closed. Only paintball guns and squirt guns are allowed on this bus! " Okay, I guess we could swing through DQ for some food, as I do believe you all like that place. Agreed?" Trinity asked the rest of the bus.
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Post by Master Warious on Jul 6, 2004 12:06:57 GMT -5
"Food!" the other girls cried happily. So Trinity drove over to DQ for some munchies. "Don't get my bus dirty." Trinity warned. "We womt." The food muffled reply came.
Meanwhile
Haldir finished bolwing up all the places in New York that sold Pepsi laughing similarly to Warious in 'evil mode'.
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Post by Tiana, eh? on Jul 6, 2004 19:05:19 GMT -5
After screaming about food, and voicing her agreements to termenate J. K. Rowling, Eowyn Skywalker hugged the vampire hobbit. "I'M NOT THE ONLY SHORT ONE HERE..." she paused. "You aren't harmed by garlic are you? I mean... that is my main weapon of mass destruction... I sure hope that it doesn't bother you or anything, Miss Vancoriel Took... ah well, let's go and eat!" ((You'll fit right in, Vancoriel, consiter that post proof that you are Middle-earthian material...!))
She jumped up and down screaming, as she pulled out a window, and pushed everyone through to DQ. "FOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!! Oh yeah, whilst we're at our reign of terror, can we do in Padmé? She's TRYING to steal MY Anakin." The diminutive Jedi looked quite angered by that prospect. "Well... not kill her... maybe just maim her for life, is all..."
***
Anakin...
Anakin sighed... no one was talking to him, and went to invent Pink Pepsi in the meantime, while eating garlic.
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Post by Trinity on Jul 6, 2004 20:26:24 GMT -5
Trinity considered the proposition for a moment. " Okay, we can get Padme, but as long as I get to keep her dresses! Or we can split htem," she said. All agreed and Trinity began to drive the bus through the city, looking for their victims...
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Post by Vanacoriel on Jul 7, 2004 3:18:28 GMT -5
"garlic my friend," said Vanacoriel while munching on a DQ[do something different *snort*], "has absoulutly no effect on me. Which is why they kicked me out of the buffy cast *face falls* Actully garlic is very interesting considering what happened to that Angel guy. His face melted into a permently un-attractive snarly thing, so I told him he didn;t have the face of an angel and then he tried to bite me but I threw my old sock *sob* at him. I mourn the loss of such a sparkly and purple sock. on the bright side though, I got a new sock! Not just anysock*ggiggles happily* a sock of ultra-rockage. [glow=red,2,300][/glow] I can now amuse my self and distroy enemys,because tthe sock is kept in Tom's awesome yellow boots of DOOM-A" The short hobbit looks out window for signs of the evil and dastardly Kate Bozo... and the cruel JK Rowling, when she caught sight of something strange. " Isnt Martha Stewart in this Buss? If so, pray tell why is she out there associating with that horrible sniveling brat who plays Hairy Potty?" glances towards the rest of the bus, bearing their interesting weapons of mass distruction.
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Post by Master Warious on Jul 7, 2004 14:28:33 GMT -5
"What?" Warious cried. "I thought I tied her up!" "GET HER!" Trinity yelled. "Hold it!" Agent Smith said. "WHAT?" (everyone else) "There are fan girls out there. They might maul you if you go in unprepared," the Agent pointed out. Warious activated her lightsaber, Eowyn had her garlic and her now shineing Random Medal Pole of DOOM. Trinity loaded her gun. "I think us three can handel it," Eowyn said. Then she lead Trinity and Warious out of the bus. "I think we can capture that kid and get information out of him. We also need Ms. Stewart alive. I hear there's a big reward for her capture." Warious said as they creapt around the bus perparing to strike.
~~~~
Haldir continued blowing up soda factories and places that sell soda. The police couldn't seem to find the culprit.
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Post by Jandalf on Toast on Jul 7, 2004 15:34:50 GMT -5
Jandalf woke up suddenly inside the bus. She had been dozing off of late, and saw now the bus was empty.
"Erk...not good." Getting up, she walked outside, blinking in the sun. Where was everybody?
Shrugging, she started off down the sidewalk by herself, on a quest. She had gotten a strange (subliminal) urge to eliminate J. K. Rowling, and was only too happy to comply. On her way to the United Kingdom, she thought she would be able to find Obi-Wan, as well.
Thus it was that the Pink Bus of Terror was empty, and Jandalf went off to the airport to buy herself a plane ticket to the United Kingdom.
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Post by Trinity on Jul 7, 2004 17:04:08 GMT -5
*** Trinity
Trinity crept up behind Martha Stweart very slowly, as not to draw attention to herself. Without warning, she began to fire the paintball gun as the others crept around and grabbed Martha and Harry. " Stop, you are staining my clothes!" Martha yelled as she, along with Harry, where dragged onto the bus. " I am sure you can find a home made remedy for that," Trinty muttered as she tied a rag around Martha's face to keep her from talking. Harry came next, although he was too frightened to talk, due to Warious' lightsaber and all. " I htink we had better go," Trinity said. It was good timing, too, for Harry and Martha Stweart fans alike were beginning to shake the bus. AS soon as they were on the road, Trinity looked back. " Where is Jandalf?" she asked.
*** Agent Vader
cuh to his despair, Agnet Vader could find now Pepsi in the city. It was that Haldir who was blwong up the factories, he just knew it! " I will find him," he muttered as he focused the Force into finding the pointy eared culprit.
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Post by Vanacoriel on Jul 7, 2004 18:35:56 GMT -5
"Would any one objectif I ate Harry?" ask Vanacoriel, "See DQ didn't really fill me up much and he looks really...tasty." She had just watch Jandalf wander off the bus and head towards the airport. "Jandalf was muttering in her sleep about empty buses and going to the U.K. I think she couldn't see me as I am amazingly short!" Grinning wildly she advanced towards the quivering Harry, pearlywhites gleaming in the artifical light of the bus.
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Post by Tiana, eh? on Jul 7, 2004 19:55:16 GMT -5
"Eat Harry?" Eowyn shrugged, sheathing her medal pole. "I don't know... I think he wouldn't exactly taste very good... you know... all evil, and snakey, and wizardy, and such. However..." she looked over at the cowering wizard. "Maybe, if you took him to Hogwarts, you could eat him there, as an example to those who would dare taint this world with the filth of their dark magic. And yeah, Jandalf is rather tall." Eowyn Skywalker, you see, had missed the fact that her master was missing until now. "MASTER?! Eep... she's probably been kidnapped by the evil characters of doominess!!! Erk..." she shook her head. "Do with Harry what you will, Vancoriel, just keep it PG, for the sake of the site! I will be the one to torment Mr. Jackson over there..." she pointed out the window. "Can we PLLLLEEEAAAASSSSE stop? I wanna kill someone today, I think..."
*** Kate, and a random other evil...
Kate B., and her newest minion, though he would never admit it watched, as Jandalf the Orange left the pink bus, in a dulled state, as her mind was on Obi-Wan. He put aside his cherry tomatoes, and stood up. "Our first target is in site," he said.
"Yes."
"Then capture her, Kate."
She rolled her eyes. Whyever did I have to join up with Denethor? "Of course... as they stand in our way, with that Pink Bus. The orange one is not the leader, but she will do... she will be our first step."
Bringing out the infamous Obi-Wan clone, they set it on Jandalf, and smiled slightly as he drew her away from her current goal. Soon they had the tall wizard in their possession, on the roof of a 152763 floor building, in a dull trance, from her Obi-Wan lust.
***
Anakin...
Something was wrong. He sensed his master nearby, and yet not. Oh no, was Anakin's first thought, as he realized he was alone, with no one there, as the others had left him. And no one to warn of the impending danger...
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Post by Trinity on Jul 8, 2004 13:15:36 GMT -5
*** Trinity
" The U.K? Why does she want to go there?!" Trinity exclaimed, slightly confused at the sudden disappearence of Jandalf. Her attentions were quickly drawn elsewhere, though, due to a certain hobbit vampire... " Hey, I don't really think you should eat Harry. See, I just got the bus detailed and cleaned and all that lovely stuff, so he would really make a mess. Besides, I have a problem with the eating of a human being by another human, wizard or not. I mean, cannibalism is wrong, and I know you are a vampire and all, but could you just get a cheeseburger or something?" Trinity said to Vanacoriel as she approached the trembling wizard. The hobbit vampire stopped to consider this proposition and Harry was spared for the moment. Trinity, satisfied that her long speech had an effect, at least for the time being, walked over to her driver's seat, and hit a few buttons. A screen came down in front of her with green symbols running down it. It was The Matrix. " This will help us find her," she said as she proceeded to read the screen. After a moment, her face went pale and she turned the screen off and put it away. " Jandalf is with Kate Bosworth and Denethor. What do you all propose we do?" she asked the group.
*** Agent Vader
agent Vader finally located Haldir and proceeded to chase him all over the city...
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Post by Vanacoriel on Jul 10, 2004 14:16:03 GMT -5
Vanacoriel, considered the matter of digesting Harry and desided that he would cause her terrible indigestion and thinking about what Trinity had said about the bus being clean she didn't eat him. Just terrorized him with her socks and boots of doom. "Alright in order to keep it PG and respect Trinity I shall not be eating Harry. He looks kind of skinny... I suppose Kate and Denethor will want to use her to lure us to their lair. They want to get the pink bus and use it to do something unspeakable. Hey is Denethor or Kate a fan of Martha or Harry? We could use Harry and Martha as bait.... and lure them away from Jandalf." Smiling at her own intellegence/not so smartness she turned and threw a sock at Harry.
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Post by Master Warious on Jul 10, 2004 15:09:59 GMT -5
"What is Jandalf doing with Denethbore and kate whats-her-face?" Warious asked ignoreing the vampirical hobbit staring at the trembling boy on the floor of the bus. "I don't know," Trinity replied. "But Kate is out target." "We could just call in out respective co-authors and have them strom the building for us," Eowyn suggested. "We could use the force and try a force mind link with her and find out what is going on, and then get her out based on any information we can get from her. Maybe, if we're lucky, we can even get Kate captured so we can then go after Rowling." Warious suggested. The gang considered their options.
~~~~ Meanwhile...
Haldir was pushing the Swoop bike to the max. An angry Agent Vader was chasing him mercilesly. A timer on the swoop beeped. 'Uh oh,' Haldir thought, 'That means Warious is going to call the swoop to her any moment now. And this teleportation device was very painfull if you were moving at full force. Haldir slowed down to a stop and hoped that Warious got to him before Agent Vader got to him. Vader was comming closer but then the swoop disappeared.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Agent Vader screamed.
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Post by Jandalf on Toast on Jul 10, 2004 15:46:31 GMT -5
Suddenly Jandalf blinked, as the world came back into focus, and saw the face of an unfamiliar woman looming above her, and a man who actually was familiar.
"Hey, Denny milord, what's happening. Say, have you two seen a chick called Kate Bosworth?"
The two exchanged glances and coughed in their hands.
"Aaaaah," said Jandalf, catching on. She thought of contacting her Padawan through the Force...but then she saw a ysalamiri on a nutrient thingie right nearby, and discovered she couldn't reach the Force.
So, filling her lungs with the clean, sweet air of New York City...heh...right...she hollered as loud as she could:
"I FOUND KATE WHATSERFACE!!! TRINITY AND COMPANY, EMPLOY THY WRATH!!!!!!"
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