Pirates of the Karaoke!

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Ah, so ye be seeking a parody eh? Well, you've come to the right place matey.....[/glow]

[glow=red,2,300]Will Turner:
Yo listen up
Here's the story about a pirate-y guy that lives in a pirate-y world
And all day and all night and everything he sees is just pirate-y like him
Inside and outside
Pirate-y his ship with the black pirate sails and a pirate sword
And everything is pirate-y for him and his-self
And everybody around ‘cause he ain't got nobody to listen.

Chorus:
I'm a pirate da ba dee da ba di da ba dee da ba di da da ba dee da ba di da ba dee
Da ba di da ba dee da ba di da (repeat once)

Captain Jack Sparrow:
I have black pirate sails with a pirate sword
Pirate-y are the clothes I bought that I wear
Pirate-y are the trees and now the trees are too
I don’t have a girlfriend because girls hate me
Pirate-y are the people here that walk around
Pirate-y like my ship it's docked outside
Pirate-y are the words are say and what I think
Pirate-y are the feelings that live inside me.

Chorus:
I'm a pirate da ba dee da ba di da ba dee da ba di da d ba dee da ba di da ba dee
Da ba di da ba dee da ba di da (repeat twice)

Will Turner:
Inside and outside
Pirate-y his ship with the black pirate sails and a pirate sword
And everything is pirate-y for him and his-self
And everybody around ‘cause he ain't got nobody to listen.

Chorus:
I'm a pirate da ba dee da ba di da ba dee da ba di da ba dee da ba di da ba dee da
Ba di da ba dee da ba di da (repeat until end)[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Govenator Swann: Ahem.....now ladies and gentlemen....CHAPTER ONE

Mysterious Person in the crowd (wearing a cloak): BOO!

Govenator Swann: WHO DARES TO BOO ME? PREPARE TO BE TERMINATED!!!

M.P.I.C: I do! And I boo you three hours a day except on Sunday!

Govenator Swann: Who ARE you?

The M.P.I.T.C throws back the cloak and leaps onto the platform

M.P.I.T.C: I am Amariden the Reckless, you stole my boat. Prepare to die!

Govenator Swann: Meep! *jumps off the docks and the crowd cheers wildly*

Amariden: Ah....now, bring me that first chapter.....[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Captain Jack Sparrow was bored....nothing amusing or exciting had happened since the adventure with Will and Elizabeth.

Captain Jack Sparrow: AGH! THE BOREDOM HURTS US, AIIIIIIEEEEE!!!! IT BURNS US! IT BURNS!!!!! Hmm...burns like rum...oooo. I like rum. I wuv it.

AnnaMaria: Oi, Jack! Are you alright?

Mr.Gibbs: Let him be lass, as long as he don't find out that Govenator Swann has started a ban on rum from Port Roy-

Captain Jack Sparrow: WHAT?!?! THE GOVENATOR DID WHAT?!

Mr. Gibbs: Er...he banned rum from Port Royal......

*Jack looks as if he is ready to keel over dead*

Captain Jack Sparrow: T-that's a violation of the rights of pirates! I will not stand for this OUTRAGE! Way anchor! Release the fore topgallant sails, AnnaMaria! Set a course for Port Royal! I have a bone to pick with the Govenator......

Mr.Gibbs: (whispering) Er....lass. Don't tell me ye put that bottle o' pipeweed into the captain's grog for Joke Night yesterday.....

AnnaMaria: I did. Mwahahahaha!

Mr. Gibbs: AGH! ANGELS AND MINISTERS OF GRACE DEFEND US!! It's a wonder Jack's not doing that crazy dancing of his.....

He looks over at the helm, and sure enough, Captain Jack Sparrow is breakdancing on the deck!

The Rest of the Crew: Go Jack! WOOT WOOT! Go Jack! WOOT WOOT! *holds up signs* 9.8, 9.8, 10.5, 10.5, 10.8! THE CAPTAIN TAKES HOME THE GOLD!

Mr. Gibbs: Why me?


[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Meanwhile in Port Royal, Will Turner is in a cave venting out his anger with an Elizabeth plushie.

Will:
The wading pool is nice and cool
How how I wish to keelhaul Liz
So happily!
*dunks plushie in the water several times*
That's for saying I'm stinky!
*Dunk*
That's for wearing an icky corset!
*Dunk*
And that, Miss Swann, is for forbidding me to eat the clam chowder!!!!! THE EVIL REPRESIVENESS!
*DUNK DUNK!*

[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Will:
Are you aware of what you make me feel, Lizze?
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you?
Why'd you look away?
Here's what I have to say

I was left to cry there
Waiting outside there
Grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

Why should you care?
Cause I was there
When you were scared
You were so alone
You, You need to listen
I'm starting to trip
I'm losing my grip
And I'm in this thing alone

Am I just some pirate
You placed beside you
To fill your empty heart?
When you turn around
Can I just play my part?
You used to love me
You used to hug me
But that wasn't the case
Everything wasn't okay

I was left to cry there
Waiting outside there
Grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

Why should you care?
Cause I was there
When you were scared
You were so alone
You! You need to listen
I'm starting to trip
I'm losing my grip
And I'm in this thing alone

Crying out loud
I'm crying out loud
Crying out loud
I'm crying out loud

Open your eyes
Open up wide

Why should you care?
Cause I was there
When you were scared
You were so alone

Why should I care?
If you don't care
Then I don't care
We’re not going anywhere

Why should you care?
Cause I was there
When you were scared
You were so alone

Why should I care?
if you don't care
Then I don't care
We’re not going anywhere

Will is interrupted by the sound of someone applauding

Amariden the Reckless: Oh that was SAD, mate. So...this bonnie lass of your's left you?

Will: Who are you and WHY ARE YOU RUINING MY ANGST?!

Amariden: HEY! I was simply noting your troubles and thought that I'd play the good Samaritan!

Will: Do you want to start something? *glare*

Amariden: Sorry to dissapoint you, but I have to be going now.......

Will picks up his sword and throws it. This leaves Amariden pinned to the wall by her vest. She jerks the sword up and down several times, managing to cut her shoulder in the process.

Amariden: OW! ACK! AGH! *Censored*-!!! NOW I'M GOING TO GET AN INFECTION! I DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT SWORD'S BEEN! Ah, I bet gangrene is setting in right now..... YOU ASKED FOR IT![/glow]

[glow=red,2,300]The epic battle ensures --->[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]ON THE BLACK PEARL:


Captain Jack: VAMPIRE!!!! ARRRRRRRRGGGGGH! DIE! DIE! DIE!

Mr. Gibbs: Ack! Fer the last time, I ain't no vampire!

Captain Jack Sparrow: Deeeeeeeeeeeeenial! DENIAL! DENIAL! DEEEEEEEENIIIIIIIIAL!*throws holy water and garlic on Gibbs*

Mr. Gibbs: ACHOOOOOOOOO!!!!! ACHOOOOOO!!! *falls over*

Captain Jack Sparrow: Maybe I should be a vampire hunter AND a pirate......hmmm.............nice........Oh, yeah...er now back to the story. [/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]
Amariden: *pant* Give it up Will! *pant*

Will: NEVER! Eeek! (Elizabeth walks into the cave)It's ELIZABETH! Oh no!Urge......to....take....drastic....measures....rising........Must....not....succumb.....to....Dark Side!



Elizabeth: WILL! Why did you just kiss that Hobbitish Pirate girl?!

Amariden: AGH! I'VE BEEN CONTAMINATED! I....HAVE....WILL...GERMS! AHHHHHHHHHH! *runs around in circles*Get it off me! AHHHHHH!

Will: It was my evil side! I had no control!

Elizabeth: Suuuuuuure......

Amariden: It's all in me head, it's all in me head....*faints in horror* [/glow]

[Amariden]

THIS IS FOR ALL OF THE STARGATE FANS OUT THERE!!!

[glow=red,2,300]SUDDENLY.....


Elizabeth: EEEW! WILL! WILL! There's a snake thingy crawling up your leg!

Will: What?

Elizabeth: OH DEAR HEAVEN NOW IT'S CRAWLING UP YOU BACK!!!!! *Grabs oar but the snake-like creature embeds itself into Will's neck*

Amariden: HOLY CRAP THAT'S A GOA'ULD!!!!

Elizabeth: WHAT?!

Amariden: A Goa'uld is a symbiotic parasite that invades the body of a host and takes over their mind for the sole purpose of gaining power and affluencne. I sure hope it's not.....

Will: (speaking in creepy Goa'uld voice) I am Hades.

Elizabeth: AHHHHH!

Amariden:.....Hades. >_<

Will:MUAHAHAHA. Bow to my power! I was once ruler of All That Is Weird. Now, if I defeat you, I shall rule the Weirdness Unfathomable again!

Amariden: Sorry your Worshipfulness, but I'm disinclined to aquiest to your request: means NO.

*Both pirates assume Matrix-style fighting stances*

Amariden: Bring it on, Will...I've got your fight RIGHT HERE

Will: (in creepy Goa'uld voice) You bore me, girl.....but perhaps this will be entertaining!

Will:
Circling your, circling your, circling your head,
Contemplating everything you ever said
Now you see the truth, you got to doubt
A different motive in my eyes and now you’re out
See you later
You see my fantasy, I want to make it a reality paved in gold
See inside, Inside of our heads (yeah)
Well now that’s over
You see my motives inside, decisions to hide

[Chorus:]
Back off I’ll take you on
Headstrong to take on anyone
I know that you are wrong
Headstrong we’re Headstrong
Back off I’ll take you on
Headstrong to take on anyone
I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong
I can’t give everything away
I won’t give everything away

[Verse 2:]
Conclusions manifest, this first impressions got to be my very best
You see I’m full of crud, and that’s alright
If that’s how I play, I guess I can get through every night
Well now that’s over
You see my fantasy, I want to make it a reality paved in gold
See inside, inside of our heads (yeah) Well now that’s over
You see my motives inside, decisions to hide

[Chorus]

[Verse 3:]
You know, You know all about [x3]
You know, You know all about my motives inside, and my decision to hide

[Chorus]

Amariden: You have serious shizophrenic issues......

[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Will takes out his gun, points it at Amariden and says "Might I escort you to the Port Royal treasury, my dear? I mean, we're all in this great big cave, you are a pirate-hobbit-jedi-padawan person and you have the key to a big room full of gold! Now move or I'll DYE YOU PINK."

Amariden decides to mess with Will--er--Hades' head: But I don't wanna marry you! I'm too weird and eccentric and bleh! *wail*

Will (as Hades): What? You flatter youself! You're not nearly weird enough for me! I like weird people. Ahh--right. Just give me the key, so I can get the gold, and I'll let you go. It isn't as if your pathetic pirate goonies can stand up to me *hisses in Amariden's ear* You WILL serve me.......I am your master.

(ON THE BLACK PEARL)

Captain Jack Sparrow: I sense a disturbance in the Matrix! My pirate senses say that *GASP* The Goa'uld Hades has awoken and possesed the whelp! Now he's insulting someone!

Will (still as Hades): Oh no. Quick, to the Matrix! Activate the transporters!

Amariden: Never!

(Elizabeth has run away by this time and has gone insane)

Will: You had better *Tosses pink dye onto Amariden*

Amariden: NOOO! I'm a NORMAL HOBBIT FROM EARTH! IT'S A CONSPIRACY! *maniacal laughter* PINK LIKE COTTON CANDY BALL I AM.

Will: HOBBIT?! Shovla hobbit kree! Egeria kree kel no taur'i! *more Goa'uldish jibberish*

Captain Jack Sparrow teleports into the cave: AYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAIEEEEEEWOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA!!!! 'Ello luv! *grins cheekily at Amariden and winks: poor Amariden is too pinked out to notice*

Will (still, as Hades): YOU!

Capt. Jack Sparrow: You think this wise boy? Crossing blades with a pirate?

Will: Uhhhhhhhhhh.............d'oh!

Amariden giggles then starts singing: I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, diddly diddly, there they are a-standing in a row! Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head! Give 'em a twist, a flick of the wrist, that's what the showman said!!!!

Capt. Jack Sparrow and Will: THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL! *throw roses and rum, cheering*
[/glow]

[Amariden]

AHHHHHHH! My goodness! I have been so boggled down with school that I haven't posted since.....AUGUST!!! *grabs frying pan and bashes herself on the head*


[glow=red,2,300]PH33R TH3 N00 STUFF!





*Indiana Jones theme music plays in the background*

Captain Jack Sparrow: NOW JUST WAIT A MINUTE, LUV!!!! YOU CAN'T HAVE A PROPER SINGING PARTY WITHOUT THE PROPER MUSIC!!!

(Amariden giggles madly)

Mr. Gibbs and the rest of the Black Pearl's crew teleport into the cave, which suddenly becomes engulfed in bright disco-ball lights and fog.......


Will trips over the fog machine and falls to the ground. The symbiote pops out of his neck and Mr. Gibbs steps on it.

Will: I'M FREE! I'M FREEEEEEE!!!!!! *tackles Amariden* MUAH! MUAH! MUAH! ^_^

Captain Jack Sparrow: WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WHELP?! BUGGER OFF, THE LASS IS MINE! *yanks the still insane Amariden from Will the same way he did to Elizabeth in the movie*

Amariden: NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUSITION! NI, I SAY! NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!

*Everyone begins writhing on the floor in pain*

Amariden: NI! NI! NI! I DEMAND.......A SHRUBBERY!!! NIIIIIIII! PH33R TH3 NI!

Will: The ni! The ni! We hates the ni we does.....Ahhhhhhh! The horrorible ni-ness of the ni!

Captain Jack Sparrow: MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!!!!

AnnaMaria: LET'S TAR AND FEATHER HER!

<crickets>

Will and Captain Jack Sparrow both turn towards AnnaMaria, bombarding her with the Cute Anime Puppy Eyes of Doom

Mr. Gibbs: Aye, that be right cruel of ye, Jack! And what would yer father say if he saw yeh now, Will?!

Will and Captain Jack Sparrow muster up the even deadlier MEGA CUTE Anime Puppy Eyes of Doom*
[/glow]

[Amariden]

Alright, this is my penance

[glow=red,2,300]*Trinity appears out of nowhere*

Trinity: THE PINK BUS IS COMING! DOOM ON YOU ALL! DOOM! Elizabeth knows of it. MWAHAHA.

Mr. Gibbs: Oh no.....something tells me there's gonna be singing!!!

Amariden, Trinity, Will and Captain Jack Sparrow: YES!!!!!

[/glow]

[Amariden]

[glow=red,2,300]Captain Jack Sparrow:
Go on and close your eyes
cause all we need is bonfire light
You and me and a bottle of rum
going to sing with you tonight
Well we know I'm going away
and how I wish, I wish it weren't so
So take this rum and drink with me
let's delay the misery

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

There's a bottle in your hand
and it's empty like my black heart
Tomorrow comes with hangovers
to take me away it's true
It ain't easy to say good-day
Luv, please don't burn the rum
Cause luv you know I want to stay, oh
Lord I wish it wasn't so

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Tomorrow comes to take me away
I wish that I, that I could stay
Luv you know I want to stay, oh
Lord I wish it wasn't so

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
and fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
tomorrow the rum is gone
tomorrow the rum is gone
tomorrow the rum is gone
tomorrow the rum is gone
tomorrow the rum is gone

Save tonight
Save tonight
Save tonight
Save tonight

THAT'S DEDICATED TO ELIZABETH SWANN! TAKE THAT YOU RUM BURNING LITTLE----*Amariden hugs Jack so that he will forget the rest of his sentence and spare the audience's ears*

Captain Jack Sparrow: I feel.....strangely happy......

*sees Elizabeth burning his new rum stash*

Captain Jack Sparrow:.......Happy feeling gone. *growl*[/glow]